Wednesday, August 10, 2011

A Mother's Heart


This post was difficult to write.  Sharing some things is challenging, but I am often encouraged by the many inspiring bloggers in blog land.

From the first moment that you hear you will be a mom you want nothing more than to protect that little life growing inside you.  And as moms know, that does not change once they are born.  More than anything we want to shield them, keep them from pain and heartache.  We would rather take on their pain than allow them to go through it.  Your heart rends and breaks as you see them struggle with life's difficulties and uncertainties.

This summer our daughter was diagnosed with Mayer Rokitansky Kuster Hauser syndrome.  I have known that something was not right for sometime and we have been seeing doctors, having bloodwork done, ultrasounds, more doctor's appointments, and mri's.  We have a diagnosis and we are thankful that it is a mild case.  This syndrome can affect kidneys, bone structure and more and we are blessed that that is not the case with our daughter.  But it still breaks my heart that she will struggle with infertility.  She will never carry her own child.  I know there are many women who have walked down this same path.  I have read the stories but never really understood the depth of their feeling, their struggle and their pain.

She is ok with this diagnosis right now but I can't help but wonder what she will feel when the time comes, she meets someone special, and they would love to start a family.  Will she feel inadequate, sorrow, or longing pain? As a mom, I would take this all from her in a minute if it were possible.  It is not possible and I will be here for her as she needs me.

7 comments:

Ellen said...

Visiting here from Stitching Under Oaks. How very sorry I am to hear about your daughter's condition. That I'm sure is heartbreaking. And yet...God is so faithful and trustworthy and good. He has plans for your daughter (as He does for all of his children) that neither you or she can even imagine right now. Will pray for peace and encouragement. Maybe this verse will help: Proverbs 3:5-6 - I think that must be my life verse and something I need to constantly remind myself of.

Adrienne said...

Oh Ruth - I am so sorry to hear that. I pray that God's Peace will settle upon your dgt and that Lord willing if He intends for her to marry they will both be comforted by God's Grace and His perfect plan for her (and them).

I heard a saying a while ago that I think is so true - 'when you have children you wear your heart on your sleeve' - we never stop loving/worrying no matter how old they are!

stitching under oaks said...

Oh Ruth, what a hard path you've been walking. I'm so sorry to hear that you've been struggling as only a mama can. I know that this diagnosis is a hard one, but I'm certain that God will walk the path with all of you. I'll be praying for you and your daughter. (I'm adopted and I'm sure my mom would vouch for the fact that although she never carried me in her womb, she carried me in her heart....so in the future, I'm sure your daughter will be able to be a mom one way or the other and will be blessed no matter what!)

~ The Jolly Bee ~ said...

Ruth, I'm so sorry to hear this. It is a tough thing to handle -- and maybe it's good that the reality of the diagnosis isn't completed grasped by her at this time. My daughter too had a bad diagnosis when she was 12 (germ cell tertoma) and it's iffy if she will be able to have children. Right now, she claims she doesn't want children, but I have the same thoughts as you. Hang in there.

Amanda Towne said...

Ruth, I'm so sorry to read this.

Laura said...

Yesterday I heard something that struck a chord... When we have problems, we need to look to Jesus to give us grace for the day, and not simply look for solutions. He will sustain us through anything, whether it is a problem resolved or not. Prayers for you and your daughter! :)

The Pennington Point said...

I heard a sermon last week that touched me. He got very quiet and said, "How can we possibly think that the plans we have for ourselves are better than the plans He has for us?"

So true! So hard to walk though. Your daughter is so precious and special. I'm so sorry she will have physical struggles. I will be praying that her joy will shine through! Lisa~

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